Since I first held the pen in my hand, I've been writing ugly, unqualified and unreadable. That doesn't mean I don't want to write nicely. Every time I started a new notebook I set out to write beautifully. And I really did. For 3-4 pages. Then I realized that if I write nicely I write too slowly, I fall behind and give up. Or I just lost my motivation and went back to my old habits.
That's kind of the case with New Year's resolutions. We start them excited, eager to forget about them completely in February, to abandon ourselves unarmed and disappointed by us once again in the familiar arms of habit and comfort. Does that sound familiar? Probably yes. It's incredibly sexy and appetizing to start over, with fresh strength, no blemishes and no mistakes. But usually a few weeks later we are left with a sense of failure and do not understand why. I had so much motivation, so much enthusiasm, where did he go?
First of all we need to understand that our brain is not a big fan of resolutions, especially if it involves major changes in our lives. We humans are made to seek pleasure, to avoid pain, and to solve as many things as possible with as little energy as possible. To lose 15 kg in 2 months, to become a great calligrapher overnight, to go to the gym 5 times a week, in the conditions in which we were not used to going at all, is a lot for our brain. He will always intend to return to his warm and familiar place.
So what do we do? How do we lose weight, quit smoking, go to the gym?
First of all, let's understand that even though our brains don't like change, they love routine. It is important to see what is in our daily routine that prevents us from reaching that goal and starting to act on it. What skills do we lack? What habits should we learn? And step by step, habit by habit, we end up creating a whole system of habits that will support us in achieving our goal.
In Atomic Habits, James Clear tells us that if we change only 1% every day, in a year we'll be 37% better than when we started.
Notice that I'm not talking about motivation, heirism, or moving mountains. Only small changes that do not mean to change our lives at 180 degrees. That's the decent thing to do, and it should end there.
We pay too much attention to the great moments and we believe that if we are really motivated this time we will succeed. Unfortunately, motivation is also a resource and it goes away quickly. We can't rely on it. A healthy future is made up of all the small and very small steps, of all the tiny choices we make every day that will ultimately help us achieve or move away from our goal.
Get in your team whoever you think can help you and get started now. Learn what you have to learn, build the skills you lack, and make 2020 the last year you have this goal on your list, whatever it is.
edited by: Nutrition Consultant Ana Szabadszalasi